That Wily Fox Cameron

Trigger Warnings – Animal abuse/death, death by asphyxiation

So this is in the news, and I shit you not here, David Cameron has promised that if the Tories win the next election, one of their priorities will be legalising fox hunting after the ban placed on it by the Labour Government of 2004. I am not joking, this is a serious issue to him apparently, one he needs to address if he gets to have his way in the next election and I’m here to put in my say for those of you who are interested because in lieu of actually slapping Cameron around the ear and telling him to be less of an entitled rich prick, this is the best I can realistically do on the matter.

No points for guessing where I stand on this issue then, in typical Green Party supporting, gay marriage okaying, upper class hating fashion, I’m against this primitive bloodsport, they say it is the sport of kings but it hardly seems that dignified and noble to ride a horse after a pack of angry dogs chasing down a lone fox or a deer and then letting them rip it apart or shoot at it, it’s not sport if one team has a clear and consistent advantage – give the fox a team of his mates and some weapons, then it’s a sport. Anyway, I’m not alone in this, in 2012 a public opinion poll showed 81% of the general public were against repealing the ban from eight years prior and though there are a large number of people supporting lifting this ban, these people are an entitled few. Now I’m not against stamping on people’s private joys, you do what you will but when your idea of having a good time involves the word ‘killing’, that’s not fair, what right do you have to kill for amusement?

Nigel Farage also wants to repeal this ban, he’s not called it a priority besides his policies on immigration and such but when Farage and Cameron agree on something, it worries me, the Kippers consist of breakaways from the Tories but in this instance we see them holding hands and as if a testament as to how out of touch Cameron is with the world, he’s running into the arms of UKIP and asking for a hug and a pint of fox blood. In the grand scheme of things, is hunting really an issue that needs addressing that badly? We have people living in poverty, apparently immigration is a major issue and there are still people without jobs and students racking up massive debts for daring to invest in their own future but nope, whether or not rich people can give the fox both barrels is much more important. A politician, ideally, should be a vessel for the will of the people, the one with the legal power to do what Joe Everyman wants to see made better about society and even in a town as rural and traditional as Shrewsbury, I’ve seen maybe two car window stickers saying “Support Fox Hunting!”. I mean, this is ridiculous that it’s even come up, this is not something worth investing resources into discussing when there are soldiers dying, children starving and companies trouncing our tax systems – are the Tories so out of touch that they honestly have to prioritise this ridiculous pass time for the rich? Do they really care so little for the people beneath them that they’re like “Oh sorry Britain, I know you’re all peeved about this wealth inequality situation but can we all take a moment of our time to decide whether or not my mates and I have your permission to go shoot woodland critters? Thanks!”

I’m not an idiot, I know there are necessary culls and population booms and jobs that rely upon hunting, I know that people will say “It’s nature, it’s good for the animals to be hunted to keep them fit!” (Which is a load of bollocks, foxes and deer have no natural predator in this country other than farmers so… they’re only learning the lesson of avoid human beings, they have muskets) but this is a cruel and inhumane way to go about controlling the population, the animals suffer a lot for the sake of fun, fun and suffering are not supposed to go together,we know that, we lock up people who think they do. You might speak of preserving tradition, of standing up for what defines our country but does that mean we need to bring back bear-baiting, the cruel process of sicking a pack of starved mongrels on a shaved and beaten bear? Or how about we bring back the British tradition of public hangings? We used to take the kids out to watch the Hangman’s Jig! Traditions should not be preserved simply because “It’s what our forefathers did!”, yeah, our ancestors used to shit in holes and display severed heads in their garden as a sign of status, we stopped those things, we can stop hunting as well – we must constantly challenge traditions for their flaws and adapt them to the times we live in for a fairer society. Some say the Hunting Act was an attack on the lives of the rural people but I’m sorry, pleasure and slaughter are not supposed to go together, that’s just how it works.

The argument about fox hunting, in particular legalising it, distracts from the real issues at hand and if Cameron brings it up, it’s going to detract from the core values of his party – immigration control, a stronger economy and welfare regulation reform – I don’t want the Tories to win the next election but even so, this is just a bad move, it’s using power and status to defend private interests. Heck, even UKIP said that whilst they want the ban lifted, it’s not something they’re actively fighting for just yet, immigration control comes first. You know something isn’t right when UKIP have more common sense… I NEVER thought I’d say that about them, ever…

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